Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Ellen Get Your Gun

It's generally easy to tell when Ellen has been digging.  There are holes where no holes should be, there are more treasures added to Ellen's "Found Objects" pile, and sometimes, if you look very closely, you can see a hint of dirt on her face.

Usually, Ellen's recovered objects are fairly pedestrian (not actual pedestrians), but the other day I came home to find her with this between her front paws:

She was chewing on the barrel, so I don't think she knows a lot about gun safety, but the greater concern was what she was doing with a weapon in the first place.  Labradors are not generally given to vengeance, murder, pistol-whipping, target shooting, vigilanteism, reckless discharge of weapons in a fit of celebration, bank robbing, shooting road signs, or any of the other main uses of firearms.  I can only suppose she intended to take her strategy of barking at her enemies to the next level.

Ellen's enemies, some of which we have in common, are:
  • The mother possum
  • The father possum
  • The baby possum
  • Pigeons
  • Ants
  • The recycling truck
  • Bees
  • High winds
  • Frozen meat
The gun has been confiscated, so I guess we'll never know which one was the target.  

And that's the end of that story.  

Unless the gun falls into more evil hands.....


  1. Is it a real gun?

    Shouldn't you give it to the police so they can solve some old murder case?

  2. Not very exciting, but it's a toy gun. Probably from when children were living here in the early eighties, back when it was OK to shoot your friends with toy guns that looked like guns, and then eat those chocolate cigarettes from Mexico while you were riding your bike around without a helmet or sun protection.

    If Ellen unearths a body I'll reconsider calling the police.


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