Friday, October 30, 2009

Things That Go "Huh?" In The Night

Last night we had a lot of trouble sleeping.  Perhaps it was because the room was airless and pongy, sealed as it was against a marauding cat with sharp teeth and evil intent.  Or maybe it was the moon.  I'm not sure what percentage  of the human body is water, but I'd had a great big glass just before bed.  Maybe that was the real problem.

Anyway, as is customary at 4:00am, I lay there panicking about very small issues, and the Fella asked me if I wanted to play the Hat Game.  The Hat Game involves naming hats in turn until someone repeats a hat, can't think of another hat, or in the case of the Fella this morning, names something that is simply not a hat.*

With my victory secured, I was able to go back to thinking about some of the big issues.  This morning's quandaries, musings and great puzzles are as follows:
  1. People in country Australia have some mighty strange ways.  Especially in regard to food.  For example, as soon as you're out of an Ikea catchment area, pickled onions become "bum hummers", eggs are delightful "bum nuts", and good old chilli sauce becomes "rectum wrecker."  This last one seen in country SA, written in a hilarious intestinal font (sans serif).
  2. By any measure Canberrra is a gentle and civilised place.  Yet there is obviously someone aggressive and frightening behind our road safety campaigns.  Warning signs on the side of the road range from point blank threats: "Drivers DIE on ACT roads, " or "Drink, drive, DIE in a ditch," to the vaguely menacing: "Drive and text, UB NXT."  I guess he couldn't figure out how to include a large red reference to death in that one.
  3. Why do squirrels bury nuts?  Clearly, and contrary to popular belief, they must hate them.
Before any of these issues was satisfactorily explored it was breakfast time.



*"The Batter"

1 comment:

  1. I fail to see how anyone dies on Canberra roads when they're all 60 zones. Our GPS alarm was going off a lot.

    ReplyDelete

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